Men who want to flirt with women have to realize: Women live in a state of continual vigilance about sexual safety. It’s like having a mild case of hay fever that never goes away. It’s not debilitating. You’re not weak. You’re not afraid. You just suck it up and get on with your life. It’s nothing that’s going to stop you from making discoveries, or climbing mountains, or falling in love. Sometimes you can almost forget about it. It doesn’t mean it’s not there, subtly sucking your energy. You learn to avoid situations that make it worse and seek out conditions that make it better.
If a female stranger is wary around you, it is not because she suspects you are a rapist, or that all men are rapists. It’s because a general level of circumspection is what vigilance requires. Don’t take it personally.
If this frustrates you, try to remember that women are blamed for lapsed vigilance. If a woman does get raped, everyone rushes to see where she let her guard down. Was she drinking? Was she alone? Was she wearing a short skirt? Did she go to a strange man’s room for coffee at 4am?
A woman must be seen to be vigilant as well as be vigilant. If she is deemed insufficiently vigilant, she will be at least partly blamed for any sexual violence that befalls her. If she’s regarded as downright reckless, that “evidence” can be used to completely exonerate her rapist. If it comes down to a he said/she said dispute over whether sex was consensual, as so many rape cases do, the dispute becomes a referendum on whether the woman seems like the sort of reckless person who would have sex with a stranger.
If a woman does go back to a strange man’s hotel room at 4am, even if she only wants a coffee and conversation, she’s more or less given him the power to rape her. No jury is going to believe she went up there for anything but sex. So, don’t be surprised if a stranger reacts badly to that suggestion.”
The Queen has been back home for like five minutes and she’s already throwing insults… and fireballs.
i’m sorry, but those are not emma shoes. not in any fucking version of her world.
￼I love that Regina inspired a classier red jacket.
Regina inspired a lot…
Along with happy memories, she gave Emma a new fashion sense. She despised her polyester blends.
when all you want is for your favorite character to be happy but all they get to be is dead
Favourite new characters of 2013 » Wendy Beauchamp
Tell [her] to back off, ‘cause I have claws and I ain’t afraid to use them."I just love the idea of witches, in general. The whole concept of witches was to keep down the feminine rise in power that was happening, at the time. They created this concept of witches, so that they could burn women at the stake and keep them in their place, and now we’ve turned it around to empower women. I love that. That’s very ironic. If they only knew that they created a weapon for us to use against them (…) Wendy is not in the [Melissa de la Cruz] books, at all, so that’s fun. (…) She’s the one that stirs up trouble. She’s a troublemaker, but she’s very grounded and loyal. She’s very loyal to her family. She’s very loyal to her sister. She loves being an aunt. She loves her nieces. (…) She’s the naughty one of the family, but she’s got good intentions. She’s really fun! She’s got something sarcastic to say, always. She’s gonna needle everyone in the family to keep everybody honest about what’s going on.” — Mädchen Amick [x]